Climbing, clawing

The darkness closes in
the fear is pressing, weighing me down
my feet are slipping
i am climbing, clawing
i make a little progess as i struggle to climb out of this pit
this pit of darkness
the weight is heavy
i struggle to breathe, to hold my head up for air
i am getting a little farther
and then i slip
i slide a little
then i gather up a little strength
the rejection, the dismissal, the ostracism
it is too much
and of christians
tell me it isn't so, tell me
i dig my toes in, dig in my fingernails
i suck in the cold, damp air
and then a heavy hand covers my mouth
it tries to strangle me and clamps down my nostrils
i am suffocating
from pain and heartache
we are forgotten, dismissed
tell me it isn't so
. . . . . . . . .
it is so
and then i fall to the bottom